Marriage: Essential to Children
Marriage is an institution that has been in place, according to creationists, since the beginning of time. Wright says, “. . . love between man and woman is a human universal” (Wright 284). Across all nations, cultures, and tongues, the desire to be with someone has always been there. During different times in history, there have been different takes on this institution. People have practiced polygamy, going both ways; one man with multiple women, and one woman with multiple men. In today’s society the ideals of marriage are now constantly being debated about for a different kind of marriage ever seen before; a homosexual marriage. Upon looking into this fundamental institution and patterns over time, heterosexual, monogamous marriage should be preserved if we want more, overall functional families, specifically that relating to the well-being of children.
No matter what the social norm may be marriage ought to be with one person, of the opposite gender, for the due sake of their protégé. In evolutionary psychology, results show that men and women have difficulties staying together; that people tend to cheat on one another when needs are not being fulfilled. According to Buss, mating is about sexual selection and competition (Buss 263). Men are content with flings and short-term relationships while a woman is interested in “. . . selection a man who would be willing to commit to a long-term relationship” (267). How can these opposites co-exist? And what does this mean in the terms of offspring? The divorce rate is high in our time; people divorce, court others, and remarry; sadly, this has become the social norm. When dependents are involved, the question of parenthood becomes central to this and essential to evolutionary psychology. The points previously stated about marriage become insignificant and negligible in comparison.
Whenever there are two imperfect people, there will be an imperfect marriage, Buss says, “Conflict in mating is the norm and not the exception” (262). There will be conflict in marriage no matter what, whether it is a polygamous marriage, a homosexual marriage, or a heterosexual marriage. The key point to be made is that although these conflicts may exist, immensely more vast conflicts will arise if there is any other form of marriage than between one man and one woman. The implications for children who are not offspring into this type of marriage are potentially damaging and advert completely from evolutionary psychology. Wright says “. . . one of the ‘most obvious’ Darwinian predictions is that stepparents will ‘tend to care less profoundly for children than natural parents’” (Wright 288). When this happens “It massively wastes the most precious evolutionary resource: love” (289).
“Daly and Wilson found that an American child living with one or more substitute parents was about 100 times as likely to be fatally abused as a child living with biological parents” (289). Another study shows that in the 1980s, “. . . a child age two or younger was 70 times a likely to be killed by a parent if living with a stepparent and a natural parent than if living with two natural parents” (289). This does not mean that children do not get abused by biological parents as well, but these statistics show the greater normalcy of it in homes where children do not live with the mother and father that produced them.
A heterosexual, monogamous marriage can first and foremost produce offspring. These offspring can then be raised, nurtured, and loved by the parents that produced them. They have a more sure sense of identity and grow up more likely in a home of love, not of abuse. No, marriage and people are not perfect and there are exceptions to all the rules. However, a heterosexual, monogamous marriage is in congruency with evolution and evolutionary psychology and preserves “the most precious evolutionary resource: love” (289).
Works Cited
Buss, David. "The Evolution of Desire: Strategies of Human Mating." Academic Communities/Disciplinary Conventions. Ed.Bonnie Beedles and Michael Petracca. Upper Saddle River: Prentice Hall, 2001. 261-277.
Wright, Robert. "Our Cheating Hearts." Academic Communities/Disciplinary Conventions. Ed.Bonnie Beedles and Michael Petracca. Upper Saddle River: Prentice Hall, 2001. 278-291.
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